wasabi in my nose

Journal Entry: November 6, 2008

Yesterday I bought from the local Asian grocer a cupful of dried peas, marinated and coated with Wasabi. I love anything doused in Wasabi. The pungent, garlicky, horseradishy searing heat gives me some sort of weird addictive thrill.

Years of Wasabi-laced food has taught me the best way to survive the stuff: 1) eat it in teeny tiny quantities; and 2) place the Wasabi directly in the middle of one’s tongue where there are far fewer taste buds.

I sat in front of the television ready to tease my taste buds. Glad there was no one watching me look the fool, I held the cup of Wasabi peas close to my face. Next, I opened my mouth wide, stuck out my tongue and placed one lonely pea in the middle of my tongue. The idea was to slowly repeat the step till all the peas were eaten.

Everything was going according to plan and I had a well-paced rhythmic process in place until an unexpected sneeze came upon me. With every intake of the three breaths before my sneeze, the sharp, unbearable essence of Wasabi from the cup shot up my nostrils. The pain was like nothing I have ever experienced. I thought my brain would ooze out of my ears and nose! 24 hours later I can still feel Wasabi air in my sinuses.

I could try and glean a moral lesson from all this, but the Wasabi effect is still too strong for that!

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